"i never leave Your hands"

just an update: my work out routine goal has been put on hold for a bit. i have been going through a really hard time in my life recently. i am so thankful for my friends and family, they have been there for me and supportive of me during this time. i am very blessed. i am so amazed at what the Lord gives us daily and how much of it we take for granted. love, hope, mercy, grace, forgiveness...the list goes on and on. for the first time in a long time i have fully put my life in His hands. i have to put my whole heart in His hands daily. i have to let go of my awful habit of trying to do things on my own. God is there, He wants me to ask for His help, and He wants me to leave it to Him. it's so easy, and yet i always take the hard way, the uphill battle. and i have always failed in those situations. it's like when i say to my daughter, "we can do this the easy way or the hard way." she should always chose the easy way, but for some reason she thinks she can get away with it if she chooses the hard way. if i have learned anything in the last two weeks, it's that i am not capable of anything without God. my strength comes from Him. my love for others comes from Him. my forgiving heart comes from Him. my very life comes from Him. the fact that i can breathe in and breathe out at this very moment, is because of Him. i should get down on my knees daily and praise Him for the everything He has blessed me with. for the last week or so, i have been reading my bible everyday and every night, and i have found so much reassurance in His Word. there were so many times where i would pray for understanding or peace, and that night i would find a bible verse or story that spoke to me and answered the questions i had asked God. how anyone could deny Him is beyond me. if it weren't for my faith in Jesus, and my relationship with Him, i don't know where i would be right now. i trust in Him and i know He has so much in store for me and my family. i find peace in that. even in this troubling time. He has not once let go of me. there is a bible verse that i have felt so blessed by in the past, but more so in the present...
Jeremiah 29:11-13. "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart."
Jesus is AMAZING!

thin mints are my weakness...

this workout thing is harder than i thought it would be. as it turns out, finding the time is the hardest part. i've had the video since last week, i've even added a couple of other workout videos on Netflix, but i've only done the workout thing maybe 3 times. that was not how i had planned this at all. and to make matters worse, girl scout cookies are on sale now. i have a weakness for thin mints. a horrible, horrible weakness. so, now is the time for me to step it up a bit. well, more than a bit, because i'd really like to enjoy thin mints while they are still around. i need to find a way to set a schedule and stick to it. something like alternating days or evenings. my plan was to workout during my daughter's nap time, but i've found that a day without that two hours to relax and read, sleep, or watch The Office re-runs, kind of turns me into "not-so-fun mommy". so, i'm thinking maybe i could work out right after i put her to bed, which is usually around 8p. i could do it on Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays, and Sundays. i need to write this down on a colorful sheet of paper, and i need to put it up on the fridge...no, the food cabinet door. that way every time i go into the kitchen on a mission to eat something for a reason other than being hungry, i will be reminded of the workout schedule. these sorts of things keep me going. with no set schedule i have leeway to be lazy and make up some lame excuse for why i decided not to workout that day. i still have half the month left, let us see if i can make something happen.

off subject...i had previously complained about the lack of snow in this quaint little college town back in December, but i take it back. tonight it snowed. it snowed a lot. and even though it didn't stick to the ground or blanket more than the cars in the parking lot, it was still beautiful and wonderful and so much fun to watch.

hot tea with lemon and honey.

my little girl has come down with a cold. poor thing. i feel so helpless in these situations. i feel like she's so miserable and basically asking for me to make it go away, but i can't. all i can do is hold her while she cries, and coughs, and does everything in her power to get comfortable. that was how most of last night was spent. it was a strange feeling for me, i felt like a new mom again. up all night, my daughter crying, me rummaging through the kitchen drawers looking for something that would make her feel better. the last time she was sick seems like ages ago. at one point last night, i held her in my arms all snuggled up in my big pink blanket, she had watery eyes and she would let out a sad little cry every time she coughed, then she would nuzzle her sweaty little head back into the spot it had been before she had to cough. i have to say, even though she was miserable, i cherished that moment. here i was, holding my precious child, and in my mind i was unable to help her in anyway, but in her mind, being in my arms was help enough. she eventually fell asleep. there were a few wake ups and crying sessions throughout the night, due to her inability to breathe through her nose, but i'm thankful she isn't worse off. most of today was spent keeping her fever down. she wouldn't take her children's Tylenol, apparently her taste buds have changed since the last time she was sick. so i did what any mom would do...i squirted it into a cup of juice and made sure she drank it all. later in the day, i put it in some warm decaf tea with honey...she liked that a lot, it helped sooth her throat. i know how she's feeling. lately, my allergies have been on the severe side. i've been drinking hot tea all week. my beverage choices have ranged from green tea to black tea, and everything in between. hot tea with lemon and honey seems the be the only thing that really makes my throat feel better. it may be a short lived remedy, but i still swear by it. i happen to make one version of hot tea that i have become quite fond of. recipe: Tazo passion tea (hot), 2 tbsp sugar, 1 tbsp honey, 2 sliced lemons pressed down at the bottom with a spoon for juice, then float them at the top. it's amazing. although, i think every tea i try is amazing. never the less, i would highly recommend this if you are feeling under the weather. plus, the tea stains the inside of the lemon slices pink...so it looks all fun and girly. i'm hoping all these sickly vibes are out of our systems soon...praying for health.

also makes a great iced passion tea lemonade.

off subject...i got started on my work out routine. very hard. i'm very sore. more on that later.

February: StaRt a WoRk OuT RouTiNe

with one month behind me and a fresh new goal ahead of me, one that i must admit, i am very excited about, i'm ready to jump right in. anyone that's close to me knows, i don't work out and yet, i eat a lot. in reality, if i wasn't chasing a 2 year old around all day, i'd most likely be obese. never the less, i've pressed my luck on this matter far too long and it's time i get my little behind back into shape. i've already began working on my diet, well it's more like a lack of constant food intake, and i've integrated much more chasing and dancing into my daughter's play time. it's still not enough. this month i am going to start a work out routine and hopefully i will be able to keep it going past these 28 days...fingers crossed. it will probably be a video work out, since it's the most convenient for a stay-at-home mom. i'm going to Target in the morning to scout out work out DVDs, hopefully i will find one worth committing to and be one step closer to achieving my goal. i secretly despise the swim suit i own at the moment. i bought it the summer after i had my daughter...that was quite some time ago. if i can just stick to this work out routine, than i may have a chance at buying a swim suit this summer that doesn't scream, 'i'm trying my best to cover as much as possible'. so, let's see how this week goes. wish me luck!